The Amateur

Earlier this week, I posted a quote by Tom Arnold, via Donald Miller, about his reason for writing a book - "I wanted something out there so people would tell me they liked me. It's the reason behind almost everything I do."

I've been rolling that around in my head, and then this morning, I got an email from Reunion pal M. - It's way cool; these two kids dancing the boogie woogie with an ace band playing behind them, and I thought about what Tom Arnold said. I wonder: do those kids do this because they believe people will like them for it? You might want to ckeck it out for yourself and see what you think:

http://www.boogiegroove.ch/video/Dancin%20The%20Boogie.wmv

When you think about all the time and energy that went into just this few minutes of dancing, it makes you wonder: If it's all done so people will appreciate you and tell you they like you, it seems a pretty high price. I mean, hours spent practicing, preparing, keeping yourself fit enough to move like that, avoiding the pecan pie, not to mention the emotional energy spent getting along with your partner (they may not even like each other, you know). Sure, the crowd loves them, and if they're in this so that "people will tell them they like them", a la Tom Arnold, they've succeeded. But it looks to me like they're doing it because it's fun.

You hear this all the time in sports: Children play games because it's fun, games like soccer or basketball or tennis. Some become really good at what they do and play at the collegiate level, and then the very best become professionals, and get paid for "playing". Their "play" becomes their "work". They all ultimately retire, and if they're lucky enough to quit before they get injured, they hold a press conference and say "The game just wasn't fun anymore."

You might say that people also do what they do for the money. But that's not why children do what they do - It's not what starts the ball rolling. Do you think Bret Favre started playing football when he was a kid because of all the money he thought he would make? Children play football, or bang on drums, or cut out paper dolls, or dance, because it's fun. They are, by definition, amateurs, doing what they do for the sheer fun of it.

The late Rev. John Claypool once wrote a little book provocatively titled "God is an Amateur". In the titular essay, he posits that God does what He does not out of a sense of duty, or as Tom Arnold "so people will tell me they like me", but because He loves what He does. For example, He sent His only Son to earth, not because He had to, but because He loved us (John 3:16,17). That's why amateurs do what they do - because they love the "doing" of it.

So maybe we should be more like children, so that our motives can be closer to God's.

Stuart Smalley vs. Tom Arnold

I like to watch reruns of Saturday Night Live on the Comedy Channel. And every now and then, there's a sketch by Al Franken, who plays Stuart Smalley ("a caring nurturer and a member of several twelve step programs, but not a licensed therapist"). His motto: "I'm good enough, I'm smart enough, and doggone it, people like me!" Stuart, for all his experience in self-help, continually falls into "stinkin' thinkin'", living from crisis to crisis, ultimately finding a shallow sense of self-worth in his own affirmation - his motto. Truth is, I really did like Stuart; I saw in him my own need for acceptance reflected back.

Donald Miller ("Blue Like Jazz", "Searching for God Knows What") writes about comedian Tom Arnold, he of 12 Step recovery also. When asked what led him (Tom) to write his recent book "How I Lost 5 Pounds in Six Years" he (Tom) replied that he "wanted something out there so people would tell me they liked me. It's the reason behind almost everything I do." (read Donald Miller, if you haven't already; this quote is from "Searching for God Knows What", chapter 8).

I identify with Tom on that one. I wonder how it would be, to live without that need for affirmation, that fleeting acceptance which, frankly, seems - no, actually is - quite superficial. Whether it comes from within ourselves ("...and doggone it, people like me!") or outside ourselves, as evidenced by our popularity, our status, our wealth, beauty, achievements, etc. - it's all made of straw, isn't it?

(By the way, I really hope you're enjoying this new blogging adventure. I'm putting a lot of time and energy into it - a lot of myself - and it would mean a lot to me if you like it. If you like it, you'd probably like me, too!)

Someday, I hope that I'll actually believe the Gospel message that says that Jesus loves me, "Just As I Am", warts and all, period.